Also posted in Mom2Mom on the Raleigh News & Observer's web site.
Pre-post-script...well after this was written, I went to the doctor and learned that I have either e.coli or salmonella.
The older you get the more constant and disgusting your various symptoms get. I have been battling a stomach flu for the past four days. No, I'm not going to regale you with the yucky physical symptoms of my ailment. But I think it's only fair to open up and share the really embarrassing aspects that affect ailing Moms.
The first thing was kind of cute. My son asked me what was wrong. Washing away my aura of invincibility, I winced and said, "My tummy is upset." My son said, "Maybe you should get it a balloon!" Of course! How brilliant....of course if someone/thing is upset...give it a balloon!!! I smiled a pale, wan smile.
The next day I felt worse. I was reclining on the couch with a comfy blankie when my son said, "Mom, what's for dinner?" I considered all of my alternatives and they all seemed to involve shedding my comfy blankie and rising from the equally comfy couch. So I said, "Here's the deal. I'll get up and make you mac & cheese...not homemade, from the blue box...OR I'll give you $20 if you fix yourself a bowl of cereal." Yes, I bribed my son in order to remain reclined in comfy blankie comfort.
The following day I felt even worse. It wasn't just about laying on the couch...it was every word, sound, telephone ring and movement grating on my every nerve. It was raining and my son and his friend were playing in the garage. Now, keep in mind that a few years back, these same two boys were skateboarding in the garage because it was raining and the child who wasn't mine (with whose parents I routinely exchange copies of our medical insurance cards) fell and broke his arm. Laying on the couch, I hear an ear-piercing scream. Somehow I find the energy within me to spring from the couch and run to the garage. I found the two boys laughing uproariously about someone wiping out and landing on his butt. I yelled, "I don't want to hear screaming like that unless someone has broken a bone!" Yes, those words crossed my lips.
Whatever semblance of good-Mom-ism you can normally muster up on a good day, slinks away little by little when you are sick. Moms don't get sick days. And in my case, I inevitably need one when my husband is on a business trip. I can't really remember ever getting sick with the rest of the family home and healthy. Thank goodness for my friends. One is not really a doctor, but he plays one on TV. And he helped me decide whether or not to go to the ER. His wife was there for comfort and encouragement. Another friend went out and got me the requisite ginger ale and saltines.
I'll feel better soon. And I'll be a better Mom too!
Di
e no discussion of cloth vs. disposable diapers. Instead of pink party dresses, we would wear
forgiving bathing suits. Instead of "Duck-Duck-Goose," we would play, "Move the chaise lounges to better maximize sun absorption!" Instead of "Hide-and-Seek," we would play, "Who can find the husband on the golf course?" Instead of Coco the Clown entertaining with stories, we would have Malibu Barbie (she knows who she is!) debating the law allowing illegal aliens to attend state universities. Aging may suck in too many ways to detail, but the parties certainly become more entertaining and interesting.
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